Greg and Lisa working title
by shadowedinsugar
Summary: The 5 times Lisa Cuddy got sick and the 1 time Greg House didn't look after her.
1. Chapter 1

The five times Lisa Cuddy got sick and the one time Greg House didn't look after her.

Lisa Cuddy had always been determined. At 3 she'd been determined to shave her head. Whoops. At 12 she'd been determined she'd been determined to beat a boy in a fight. And at 30 she'd been determined to become a female Dean of Medicine. She'd suceeded at all these things. Now at 42, despite waking up feeling like she'd been hit my a bus, with a throat like she was swallowing a bed of nails and a rapidly worsening runny nose, she was determined that Lisa Cuddy did NOT get sick. It looked like she might finally fail despite her determination.

As she made her way about her suburban house preparing for work, her determination was starting to waver. She'd almost overbalanced in the shower when a heavy sneeze caught her off gaurd, and had gone through half a box of tissues already- creating a rather rudolph-y tinge to her appearance.

By the time she'd forced her aching body into a black dress and the lowest heels she owned, her determination had shifted, from being sure she wasn't unwell, to being more determined that she would go into work despite a little cold.

The journey into work helped her confidence slightly, although she quickly realised that this was more due to the comfy seats of her car than a super-human immune system. She weaved through the hospital as quickly as her heavy legs and congested head would allow her, hoping to avoid House, who would instantly recognise that she was fighting a streaming cold.

She told her assistant to hold off any visitors, especially House, and spent the morning attempting paper work until an emergency meeting of the Transplant Commitee at 12pm. Even as she arrived and took her seat at the head of the table, she knew she was in no fit state to make this sort of decision, and immediately chose to take the option to abstain. She spent the next hour sniffly, coughing into the back of her hand, and keeping her mouth firmly clamped shut to avoid any oppurtunity to sneeze. She also had the growing worrying feeling of lightheadedness, all she'd need would be to faint in the middle of a meeting and her reputation would be shot.

Eventually the meeting drew to a close, Cuddy had absolutely no idea what the result had been, by this point she was past the point of thinking this was a cold, she knew this was the hardcore flu which was making her feel rapidly worse, she even suspected she may vomit, or even pass out. It took her so much effort to return to her desk, whilst avoiding House, that she had to stop 3 times to rest in bathrooms, elevators and even a cleaners cupboard. Eventually with a breath of relief she returned to her, seemily freezing, office. Just as she sank into the chair behind her desk, she sneezed heavily into her shoulder, unfortuneately for Cuddy, it was at this second House chose to appear as if by magic.

"We keep this sick people down the hall you know" He quipped, immediately noticing the red nose, glassy eyes and sniffles of someone feigning health. "You should probably get that lovely rotund ass of yours back home to bed before you infect the lovely good people who work under your command, namely myself. I'm on vacation from tomorrow, I don't want to spend it harbouring tiny Cuddy cooties"

Cuddy stood up, debated what to say, and after what felt like several centuries, realised her head was too muggy to think of anything coherant to say, let alone anything witty, and settled for raising an eyebrow and giving him what she sincerly hoped was a withering knew she'd been foiled, she knew she felt like she could fall off the chair at any second, suddenly the faint feeling she'd been fighting throughout the morning peaked. Black dots appeared in front of her eyes, and she saw the floor rising to meet her....

"Lisa, Lisa... anyone home?" No-one called her Lisa anymore, she was sure that half her employees didn't even know that her first name was Lisa. Her head was still far too muggy to even think about who it could possibly be....

"Come on Cuddles, I want to go home" Now there was no doubt about from whom the voice was coming from. But calling her Lisa, that was a very un-Houseish thing to do. Apparently he immediately felt the same, and quickly followed the niceities with a swift insult.

"I must say, your much less do-able with a runny nose and a smacked head, I'll have to alert Wilson immediately so we can edit our "S3Xy aDmIn!sRaToRs 09" tally."

"What happeded?" she asked her voice heavily laden with congestion.

"Well, we were doing the whirly-bird, and I think I got a bit excited...."

The next thing she was aware of was being lowered down onto the sofa in her office, covered by a blanket, and seeing the concerned face of Wilson and the slightly cocky looking face of House staring down at her.

"You have the flu. You're going home. I'm taking you. Is that simple enough for your fever addled brain to comprehend?"

Cuddy sneezed a well aimed "haschoo" into her shoulder in response.

".... Wait! Deluded!? I'mb dot deluded!" She spoke loudly, trying to sound strong, but only succeeded in sounding congested and hoarse.

"Coming into work with the flu! Thinking straight!? No way in hell! Don't you remember what happened last time!?"  
"Which timb....?" Cuddy thought back.... falling into a fever induced sleep and remembering her previous ailments.


	2. Chapter 2

_Lisa sank down onto Greg House's bed, soaked through from the rain and exhausted. A soft sneeze from her side of the bed reminded Greg of her earlier claims of feeling a bit under the weather.  
"Hey Greg, do you hab any tissue? I think I bight be comig down with a bit of a cold...."  
"Came"__"Huh?""Congestion, fatigue, sneezing, sore throat.... You're not coming down with a cold, you've already got one...."  
"I'mb sorry, shall I leab? I don't want you getting sick?"  
"I suppose I can take pity on you and allow you to stay.... for a while" Greg House was known around campus for being an ass. He was an ass. But damn that Lisa Cuddy brought out the soft side in him, he ever found himself rummaging around drawers and shelfs for tissues._

_Whilst Greg searched his unfathomably messy dorm room for a scrap of tissue, Lisa was fighting a losing battle not to sneeze._

_"Here!" Just as she was about to sneeze wetly into his pillow, he forced the sleeve of his hoodie in front of her face._

_"Oh my god- I'mb so sorry, that's disgusting! Oh no...."  
"AH-HA! I found the tissues!"_

_They went on to spend what should have been a horrible weekend, in bed with streaming colds. They even had to send out Lisa's friend to fetch tissues. Together they coughed, sneezed and looked after each other. Even when Greg sneezed into Lisa's hair, and "accidentally"blew his nose on her pillow case. But somehow they had fun. Whether it was competing who was sicker, or argueing over types of soup, neither of them would admit it, but it was the most fun being sick had ever been.  
_

_Lisa left Greg's dorm room 3 days later, tired, still fighting the remnants of her cold, and with a very red nose, but feeling the happiest she had in years.  
_


	3. Chapter 3

**Sorry it's taken me so long to update guys- been rather busy. Anyway, here are two short chapters rather than one average sized one, it just works better that way- trust me! Thank you to all the lovely people who've reviewed and to those who've added me to their story alert. It's very appreciated :D Hope you keep on enjoying, and I promise to update faster next time!**

The Cuddy 20 years on from this, who had long since stopped being referred to as "Lisa" by anyone, not least by the House she no longer called "Greg", woke up on the sofa in her office, she sneezed, this time into a tissue she found had been placed in her hand, and went back to sleep.


	4. Chapter 4

AN: I made up where House had grown up- because it was important to this tiny chapter and his character had moved around a lot so I just made something up! If anyone has a more appropriate location then hit me up and I'll change it!

_Greg House only visited Illinois, where he'd spent a large portion of his childhood, once a year. Not to visit his parents, he avoided them like the plague, but just to check that everything was where he'd left it, that no-one had moved the lake whilst his back was turned. This time he'd decided that Lisa Cuddy would accompany him. If only so that they could get it on in another state._

_"Greg, pull over."  
"Why?"  
"Trust me. You want to pull over, right now"  
He glanced over to the passenger seat where Lisa was sitting, so pale she appeared almost green. He pulled over just in time for her to throw herself onto the grassy side of the road and vomit repeatedly onto the ground._

_"I told you not to help that vomitting child."_

_"Shut... Up...." she gasped in a breif break from her stomach trying to evict itself via the oesophagus._

_Greg ended up paying for a motel on the road side. It cost him $100, and they had no sex, and Lisa definitely had no fun- spending the entire time with her head down the toilet whilst Greg held up her hair. But as horrible as the night was, at least she wasn't alone._


	5. Chapter 5

_Not Alone._

_That was the exact opposite to how Cuddy spent one February when House was with Stacey. _

_She'd booked a week off. She was determined to finish the decorating in her new house, no, new __home._

_Unfortuneately, her immune system had another plan, and had conviniantly chosen to take the same week off._

_She later realised that a week is set to be bad when you spend Sunday night being thrown from freezing cold to boiling hot at the speed of light, with a sudden cough, and the inability to differentiate between sleep and wakefulness._

_By Monday morning, Cuddy couldn't even think straight enough to tell herself she had the flu. Her feverish mind told her that the only way she could feel a normal temperature would be to sleep at the very left edge of the bed. After spending 2 hours drifting into sleep only to be awoken by her own hacking coughs, Cuddy realised that the decision to sleep at the point of the room furthest away from the bathroom had been a grave mistake._

_She got up from bed as fast and she could, however by the time she reached the doorframe between her bedroom and the en-suite bathroom, the room started swirling with dizziness, she realised she wouldn't make it to the toilet, and ended up vomitting over the floor. 10 minutes later Cuddy found herself sitting in the empty bath, crying like she'd never cried before. She couldn't stop the constant stream of thoughts circling her mind._

_"I'll never be a mother. I'm not even a good doctor. House makes all the good calls. I shouldn't be the Dean of Medicine. I can't handle it! I can't even look after myself when I have a touch of the flu. How am I going to clean up my bathroom when I can't even stand up without nearly fainting? I'm just so pointless. Why do I even bother? I look so old. I am so old.I'm so pointless. I don't help anyone. Maybe the world would be better off if I wasn't even here"_

Before she knew it, she'd fallen asleep exhausted in a flood of tears, wearing only some skimpy pyjamas, allowing her feverish body to be soothed by the cool enamel of the bath.

_She wished she had House to look after her, like he'd used to in college. Those were the days. Actually, at this point she wished she had anyone to look after her, She'd even settle for her parents, who she'd spent the first 18 years of her life hiding any illness away from out of a strange embarrassment._

_Lying in the empty bath, Cuddy thought about her options. She could call House, no, he was with Stacy, he wouldn't to have to leave her and travel all the way just to babysit a sick collegue who couldn't even cope with the damn flu alone. She could call Wilson. But no. He, like House, was strictly an employee. Not a friend. She didn't really have any friends these days. God she was pathetic she thought to herself. She could go back to bed, but no, she didn't want to leave such a mess on the bathroom floor. Which left one option. To get up, and clean up. _

_It was at that moment, contemplating the hell to come she made several resolutions to herself. She'd step up her hand washing and germ-prevention. She never wanted to be this sick again. She'd make an effort to bond with Wilson, and House, she wanted that good relationship back. And she'd sort out her life. She didn't want to be lonely anymore._

_Two hours later, she'd managed to clean the bathroom as best she could, and had finally had a bath complete with water and had installed herself on the sofa, wrapped in a blanket feeling deeply sorry for herself._

_It was at this moment she decided to put one of her resolutions into practise. She dialed the number she'd long since memorised, the one that belonged to one Gregory House, she wanted to ask for some help, she was sure he cared enough to help her, even if just for an hour._

_He was with Stacy having a debate about religion. He sent her call straight to Call Waiting...._


	6. Chapter 6

_"Please don't let me see anyone_. _Please" Cuddy begged to a god she didn't believe in to allow her the walk from her office to the bathroom "Why, why this of all weeks does this one have to be the week the bathroom in my office packs up?"_

The cramps rippling through her lower abdomen had been worsening all morning, and suddenly 2 minutes previous to her sneaking through the hospital, the pain had peaked and she could no longer sit still, partly because the pain nausea had suddenly worsening, and in part because she felt slightly better when stretching to stand up. 

_  
Only yesterday she'd had the faint hopefullness that 7 weeks without a period may mean the possibility of pregnancy. However after a trip to the bathroom at 4am followed by a hasty dash to the 24 hour supermarket for supplies, that hope had been extinguised, and replaced with the worry of early menopause, aching sadness, and the worst pain she'd felt in years._

_She slipped quietly as possible into the empty bathroom, and looked at herself in the mirror. God she looked old. The wrinkles of her face were finally becoming visible to the naked eye. She swore her hair had a grey tinge. And now she was probably menopausal too. She'd never make it as a mother. Just as the tears building in her eyes threatened to drop, the door opened and Cameron walked briskly in, stopping to smile at her boss in the mirror._

_Cameron knew that something was up. She knew the look of someone on the verge of tears, and a gentle sniffle from the next cubicle confirmed her suspicions. A couple of minutes later, Cuddy, praying Cameron had left, emerged from her cubicle, slightly red eyed, and still just as nauseous and almost doubled over in pain. _

_"Are you ok?" Came the question Cuddy was dreading. Damn Cameron and her need to nuture. If she couldn't bluff her way through the next 5 minutes, she'd have House on her back, taunting her in her vulnerable state until she promised him a lifetime supply of lollipops, vicodin and prostitues from the hospitals budget, or something as equally insane._

_"Yes. I'm fine thank you. Don't you have a patient?" She tried being snappy to compensate for how weak she felt, emotionally and physically, but failed miserably._

_  
"Urrm no, House annoyed him so much he seemed to just, get better.... probably to annoy House, we never found out what was wrong.... And ok, it's just, you look exhausted. Can I do anything for you?"_

"No." Again her attempts at being snappy failed, and she wished more than anything that she'd never set foot into the bathroom, trying to look as professional as she could whilst barely able to stand, she left the bathroom, and silently counted the minutes until Wilson, or House, actually most likely both of them, along with the team, would arrive in her office and offer the Spanish Inquisition.

_An hour later, her fear of another of House's minions discovering her in such a state was disappearing. Sadly, the feeling of a rock forcing itself against the inside of her abdomen, was still far from disappearing._

_But she was resolved, it was just life, as a damn woman. She unlocked her desk drawer, it had been locked for weeks since she only kept an emergency umbrella, packet of paracetamol, and some spare car keys._

_Opening the drawer, she blinked a few times as she saw the scrawled post-it note complete with 2 little white pills._

_"To Lisa. Bet you wish you had a penis right about now. But then I wouldn't get to look at your boobs all day, so I'd never come to work. Take two vicodin and see me in the morning. Greg."_

_She dry swallowed the pills, grabbed her car keys and slept soundly for 10 hours in her warm bed. Pondering how on earth he'd gotten into her drawer and known she wouldn't open it again until the monthly vice gripped her._

_It wasn't until the next morning she realised, he hadn't called her Lisa in years._


	7. Chapter 7

Sneezing softly, her foggy brain assuming she was at home, Lisa Cuddy stirred into wakefulness. Only then did she realise that it was not in fact her pillow she was laying on, but the crumpled motorcycle jacket that belonged to her most irritating employee.

She hated being ill. But more than anything, she hated anyone knowing she was ill. The only person who'd ever been 'allowed' to see her weakness, and take care of her when ill was the one person who really no longer existed, the Greg that she hadn't called Greg in years. The House that had replaced him, would never take care of her now.

The motorcycle jacket began to speak, and with a shot of embarrassment, she realised, it in fact contained a person.

"Feeling better Lisa?"  
"You've not called me that in years, not since we were-"  
"I know, you're Cuddy the professional though aren't you...."

**Okay, basically, the end, the last chapter and half of the penultimate chapter are pretty rubbish, I know, I rushed them, because it suddenly started stressing me out that I STILL hadn't finished them. And my plans for this whole F/F got ruined when I posted some chapters in the wrong order blahblahblah. Anyway, I'm sorry.**

**I just wanted this to be closed FOR NOW. But it will be fixed. Probably largely re-written. Been having a few personal issues blablabla so not really had the time/ inclination to be honest. But I hate that it's not been done properly :( Really annoyed I messed it up, but was stressing that I'd had about 3 chapters saved on my computer that I'd not updated. Anyway you get the picture.**

**Please don't think of me as rubbish because of my slightly bad finale. I'M SORRY!!!**


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